The King's Speech, the guide's ear

In "The King's Speech," Geoffrey Rush plays an eccentric speech therapist with an unlikely client -- The Duke of York and future king of England, whose lifelong stammer makes public speaking a wrenching experience for man and audience alike.

The filmmakers are said to have played fast and loose with the story's historical accuracy. But they were bang-on when it comes to certain universal, psychological "truths." I'd like to explore a little of why Lionel Logue's approach to therapy was so effective and inspiring.

Trust. The two men agreed to a partnership to improve a "mechanical" issue, but the Duke's physical stammering was only a symptom of what needed treatment. It took a potent mix of bullying, cajoling and compassion from Logue to expose enough of the root issues for real healing to being.

Hope. Once "Bertie" allowed himself to become vulnerable, his therapist had to prove himself trustworthy. Logue did it by proving to the Duke that there was hope for a cure -- and proving it again and again, no matter how stubborn the resistance.

Commitment. If you've seen the film, you know that was one rocky client-therapist relationship. And yet both men kept showing up with the courage and tenacity required to create lasting change.

If you have ever been a child, you know that childhood brings with it plenty of painful experiences. Facing that original pain, demanding a life free today of its crippling effects, and discarding the old armor and weaponry that protected your inner self for so many years -- this takes courage, time and practice, practice, practice.

Acceptance. The Duke's father majestically demonstrated the damage of an abusive approach to a stammering child. Healing cannot, will not be forced. Fear cannot trigger true peace and empowerment, only ever-more reactionary strategies that try to relieve the fear.

Logue's secret gift lay not in jaw exercises or tricks for pronouncing "p" on demand -- it was his creation of a precious, all-too-rare safe space for the Duke to express his true self.

A little more about this third element. As far as we modern Americans seem to be from the stiff-upper-lip rigidity of the British monarchy, we are still far from comfortable with accepting people's honest, emotional, mercurial selves. We can start to change that, in our own relationships and in our communities, by practicing the skills of deep listening.

Check out the upcoming Feb. 1 entry for http://riamegnin.blogger.com for more on the power of a good listen-to!

No snow days for writers

The best part about being a freelance writer and workshop leader is getting to work from home. And as most folks I know who work from home will tell you -- it's also the most challenging part.

Which reminds me about being a freelance writer and workshop leader with ADD. The best part is having a million ideas an hour and getting to shift from one topic to another at any second. And -- you guessed it -- that's also the most challenging part.

On Monday, I found myself dashing through about 50 important tasks in the course of three hours. On Tuesday, I wrote two important e-mails, made lunch, and spent the remainder of the day websurfing, reading Mark Twain & Anne Frank, and playing an utterly pointless, utterly addictive Flash game for hours on end.

So, being a work-from-home writer means also being a bit of a psychologist.
- What's going to trigger me to produce my best work today?
- How can I head off distractions at the pass?
- What subconscious fear is keeping me from success?
- Is there someone I can recruit who will tear the laptop from my mindlessly clicking fingers and order me to refocus (threats of violence might help)?

OK, time to hit the library and rock these submissions! (I am not posting this at watergun-point. But that might be necessary tomorrow.)